May 18, 2009


With a nod to Kelli, whose "Confession Tuesdays" are one of my favorite blog pit-stops, I thought I'd offer up some confessions.

-I have never had a cigarette. I've had family members' whose health were greatly impacted by cigarettes. I have asthma, and allergies, that should rightfully preclude cigarette-smoking in a heartbeat.

That said, I have the gut instincts of a smoker. I like being around people while they smoke. I like the fussing, the ritual, the substitute for a snack of or a sip. One of my best friends, back in UVA days, used to give me one of her cigarettes at the beginning of any night out--I'd tuck it behind my ear and periodically sniff it, a vicarious fix. When I was at the Sewanee Writers' Conference I should have been turned off by all the smoke.

I wasn't turned off. I was tempted.

-Bacon is one of my favorite flavors. Pineapple is another. I have never actually had the charred-bacon/caramelized-pineapple flavor combination, partially because I am afraid I would like it SO much that I would never again be satisfied by either food by itself. I've been to Hawaii more than once! How did I leave Hawaii without experiencing that combo?

-If I had the right excuse, I would move to Hawaii. Otherwise it is feeling like DC or Bust. I love DC.

-My favorite emotion is anger. That's the most interesting emotion. Poems written from anger, even when they are sloppy, grip me. The ability to express anger effectively is devastating and enviable.

-Until last month I did not own a digital camera.

-One of the best jobs I can imagine is scanning HBO programming, sizing up the 2-second clips that offer parallel actions or expressions, then stitching together season promos set to hipster music. I love those promos.

Other jobs I'd like to have: Writing caption or catalogue copy for gallery exhibits. Working in a wine store. Writing children's books. Teaching swimming at the elementary-school level.

-When I was much younger I was obsessed with logic puzzles. Wooden sliding-panel mazes. Crosswords. A subscription to Games magazine. I hit a point, though, at which I rejected it all; oddly enough, I think it was when I went to a magnet school for science & tech, once I was finally surrounded by people with the same nerdy interests. What I'd loved about all of those pursuits, before, was their privacy. I couldn't stand to pursue them once I was afraid I might fail them in comparison to other kids.

-Millionaire Matchmaker? Yeah. I totally watch it.

...Looking for more confessions? Keep an eye out for this Sunday's Washington Post Magazine. In regards to this week's "XX Files," my mother said "Well, it could be worse. My whole family was prepared for it to run on Mother's Day."



Elisa Gabbert said...

I've never had a cigarette either! Some of the elements of the habit appeal to me (in college I liked holding my friends' lit cigarettes) but not so much w/ the smell & the cancer. Nor do I like being left alone in the bar when everyone else wants to smoke. :(

Steven D. Schroeder said...

I've also never smoked a cigarette. I took one drag off a friend's a year or two ago in the middle of a conversation about how I'd never even done that. I was not tempted to continue.

Maggie May said...

I'm in line for that HBO job